Mom, Is There Booze in the Cake?

So my mom brought over a homemade trifle this weekend just because she's a very nice mom. Now, the thing is, my mother's trifles are usually soaked with brandy (or some sort of liquor). So when she put it on the table, Seamus looked at its glistening berries and thick homemade whipping cream and descended on it with fingers ready to be licked. So I stopped him and said "Sorry, buddy, it's a dessert for the adults."

A huge wave of disappointment washed over his face and he sulked down into the basement. So we're all chatting a few minutes later and he emerges from the basement for another try. He yells at me from the kitchen:

"Hey mom, is there booze in this cake?"

Now it's nice to know that he's still policing himself from alcohol but, really, a four year old saying "booze" as though it was "sugar" or "strawberry"...Help us all...

Hair Cutting?

So MJ doesn't have waves of luxurious thick hair, but she did have a pretty serious mullet (that's why you don't see a lot of shots of her from the back). So Grandma Barbara and I took all three kids to get a trim last week. MJ put on her haircutting best dress for the event (she's so vain).

All three kids sat quietly and had their hair cut without so much as a cringe. This is not how it goes when I chase them around the yard with my summer shears. Talk about money well spent (thanks Grandma). It was a much more pleasant experience for all of us - I promise to take pictures of their next hair cut in the back yard...

Did I say Spring thaw?

So I shoveled out from under several inches of snow this morning - and I'm pretty sure that it's April...I'm hoping this is God's sense of an April fool joke and that we're done with all the white stuff until next year.

I know we've had a quite a break from blogging - but I hope to be back with renewed commitment this week (famous last words). Most people I know have had a hard time blogging lately - maybe its the end of winter doldrums or else this is just a busy time of year. But anyway, I'm back.

Grandma Barbara spent ten days with us over Easter - a very snowy Easter at that - but I think she had a good time and I know we all (especially the boys) really loved having her with us. She took the boys to see Horton Hears a Who at the Highland movie theater - Finn ate his weight in popcorn and had to use the bathroom midway through the movie (better than an accident I say). Seamus also had a special trip to Barnes and Nobles to share some stories and hot chocolate with Grandma. He picked out a few books for himself but was very clear that they'd better get an equal amount for Finn (he learned the "even piles" rule from Grandma herself). She bought a condo near Connor and Andie last week (yippee) and we are so proud of her (and excited for trips to another beach!). She and Kate closed on the same day!

But even though this was a hard first milestone for us, I am amazed at human resiliency. Barbara is remarkable. Her capacity for helping others with grief - especially the kids - as well as her ability to really laugh and share joy with the kids. She's got a rich, smiling laugh that earned her the title "Life of the Party". And she always is. We were so glad she came back for Easter this year. Easter is about reconciling the ending and new beginning of life - it's timed nicely with Spring - especially this year because everything still feels off for us. We want sunshine and tulips and yet we still slog through snow and slush - but we know its not forever. The apple trees will bloom in no time, but the wait isn't always easy. And sometimes we feel frustrated and disappointed. Being with Barbara helps us all to see the joys still present in our lives. We had lots of fun. Lots of love. And we can't wait until next time.

We also celebrated Kate's birthday on Saturday with "brunch" (who knew Frost's doesn't serve brunch on Saturday - but did you know the Capital View Cafe serves breakfast all day...same thing right...) and Sunday with a surprise Wild game (they won). Kate's been with us for about 6 months more or less out of the last year and so it's going to be a little strange when she moves into her new place this weekend. So many things have crystallized for us over the last year - and so many things are fuzzy still. I'm sure that living with her brother and his three kids hasn't always been an oasis nor has it always been perfect to share energy and space with another adult. But if we know anything to be true, it's that God gave us siblings, aunts, nephews and nieces, because family is unlike anything else. And we are grateful for every moment we have together because all of those times are precious even in their ordinariness.

We have all struggled over the last year - and struggling together isn't always easy - but for us it's been so much better than being apart. We love Katie and we are so excited for this next phase for her - the new home, the exciting job, the new friends and fresh start. It's hard not to be envious sometimes of all the exciting "newness" of the next year for her (especially when you see how cute her place is and how closely located to good coffee and shopping it is). But we feel blessed by having her so close to us - for all the fun we have right now - but also for what I know the future can bring. Long walks, gin and tonics on the porch (hers or ours), watching the kids playing sports (however hysterically), trying new restaurants, museums, concerts. Enjoying the luxury of last minutes dinners or brunches. Just being able to share our lives casually again. We know how important the everyday is - and I'm so grateful for the everydays we've enjoyed together over the last year as well as the ones that Spring will bring with it. I hope this was a happy birthday, but I also hope for an even better one next year. We love you.

I can't get pictures posted right now - so I'll add more later.

Spring Thaw

So time seems to travel either in fast forward or slow motion. Sometimes it all seems a blur either way. I can't say exactly what's been so busy - although truth be told - besides the daily life of small children - we went on vacation, babysat at Reagan's, finally potty trained Finn and James just got back from New Jersey visiting his mom - so I guess there's been a lot going on. But at the same time things seem to have slowed down a little, laundry is caught up, closets are cleaned, toys are organized and we're all just awaiting the Spring thaw.

MJ is starting to babble - the basic mamma, dadda, noooooo. She also started to crawl up the entire flight of stairs in about 4 seconds today. So life is never dull. The boys have been trying my patience lately in a classic catch 22 sort of fashion. They haven't been listening very well - I tell them "go potty", "get in bed" and "pick up" 50 times for every task - but they're usually ignoring me because they're having so much fun together. What do you do? I'm playing hard ball today and we had no stories at naps today because they got into a giggling fight - Seamus had been playing with a pirate map and Finn was mocking him calling him "Map Boy." And then they'd both burst into laughter.

Finn's language has exploded - James and I believe he went straight from simple two word sentences to "the negotiator". Everything starts with: "Just a little bit? How about just two? Really fast, momma, I'll be quick." And so on. He also has learned a new trick - when the boys are fighting over one toy, I set the timer and they each get a 5 minute turn. Today, Seamus got his turn and Finn played near him for about 30 seconds than disappeared into the kitchen. At which point I hear beeping from the timer and Finn yells: Seamus, it beeped! Now I knew that it couldn't have been 5 minutes, so I go into the kitchen and see Finn smiling. He's pulled a chair over to the timer on the microwave and hit the cancel button a couple of times...Imagine high school...

Seamus has also had some zingers lately. He brought Rexy (his favorite T-Rex dino from Cousin Pam) into the kitchen on Sunday. He told Kate and I that Rexy needed his rest - and he was going to put him to bed in the small bedroom upstairs. Then he pulled up his shirt and started "nursing" Rexy - he looked at the funny expressions on Katie and my faces and said "well, first I've got to feed him!" Good Lord.

He's also taking to saying "god" as in "Oh my..." When asked where he learned to use naughty words he said: "Lewis and Dennis" - Peggy's twin 10 year old neighbors. James always looks knowingly at me and says: "Sure you did, Seamus." And then I blush...Guess my days of colorful language are gone (almost).

I bought a case of granola bars last week - I should have brought in samples of Meth instead. I keep finding the boys hiding behind sofa, in closets and behind the shower curtain eating these cursed things. There are almost gone...thank goodness....

It's a beautiful day today, but there is still snow on the ground and we are so excited for green grass, tulips and long evening walks.

Today. Everyday.

Yesterday was Paula's birthday. Katie coined the term "Paula-palooza 2008" because we had a two day celebration including lots of wine, a facial, a movie, a green crown and FABULOUS Chinese food. Paula may have thought it was a bit over the top but Katie and I had as much fun as we've had in a long time.

Paula's birthday will always be a complicated and poignant anniversary for me - we had just gotten home last year from DiGidio's with Bob and Paula when James's dad called to tell us that Tom had died. Our world changed. Tom was gone. Over the course of the next two days Paula took care of the boys, brought food, helped us get ourselves together before we left for Charleston. We were filled with fear, sorrow, anger and a litany of other varying emotions as time went on. There hasn't been a day since that I didn't think about that night and how nothing would ever be the same again. When we got home from the funeral, she brought more food, more flowers, but mostly she was just available for us. Whatever we needed, whenever we needed it.

When James's dad died she and Bob flew to New Jersey and took care of the kids during the wake and funeral. While we were still gone they repaired our car, cleaned our house, and bought groceries.

I had been waxing poetic about our friendship with Paula on the blog the day before Tom died - I feel a bit naive about it now - as it has turned out I had no idea the kind of friend Paula would be or how much we were going to need she and Bob over the course of the next year. And so now a year later, I just don't have anything more to say. Our debt to she and Bob as well as our joy in their friendship is really without words. I was tired a few week ago at Sunday night mass - feeling a little sorry for myself and there was a hymn sung during the offertory - "Let Me Be Your Servant"

Will you let me be your servant, Let me be as Christ to you;
Pray that I may have the grace to Let you be my servant, too.

We are pilgrims on a journey, We are trav'lers on the road;
We are here to help each other. Walk the mile and bear the load.

I will hold the Christ light for you In the night-time of your fear;
I will hold my hand out to you, Speak the peace you long to hear.

I will weep when you are weeping; When you laugh I'll laugh with you.
I will share your joy and sorrow, Till we've seen this journey through.

And I had a good cry and thought about Paula and how she's carried us so often during this time. So much has changed since last year - not only for James and I - but for she and Bob too. Their boys are getting older and they are preparing to send their 18 year old son, Eric, to war - we all have more fear and worry in our lives than we did last year. I can only hope that I can be to her all that she has been to me.

So today, as everyday, there is fear and sadness, but there is also love and comfort. We wake each day to choose which pair we fully embrace. I appreciate birthdays more now. I think I appreciate everything more now. Especially the people I love. Especially Paula.

Happy Birthday, Paula. I don't know what the next year will bring - but I know that I am grateful to be on the journey with you.

Speed skating hyjinx

Paula and her family are bigtime speed skaters. They've long been trying to attract us to "THE OVAL" http://www.skatetheoval.com/ - the world's largest refigerated sheet of ice.

WOW. It's the world's largest refrigerated sheet of ice. That's a lot of stinking ice. I believe it's bigger than 6 football fields laid next to each other. Seriously. A lot of ice.

Here's Paula's nephew Mack pushing Seamus around on a skate chair. The boys LOVE Mack - he's always great to them. However, after Seamus made him go around the oval (NOTE: largest sheet of refrigerated ice in the world) 6 times - he looked pretty tired. Luckily, Seamus cheered him on with wonderful motivational slogans such as "Faster, Mack, FASTER" and "Stop going so slow..." Thanks again, Mack.

Our buddy Finn took a lap with Paula's sister, Nancy. (Nancy is also Mack's Mom) We love Nancy -she's also great the Dougherty family. She does have this odd quirk - she always wears a tigger costume. You get used to it after a while. "the wonderful thing about Tiggers.....is Tiggers are wonderful things!"