Four Years Old Already...

Sometimes it feels as though life runs in fast forward - for me today is the epitome of that feeling. Seamus turns four years old at 4:30 this afternoon. He's been talking about his birthday constantly for the last month and so I was a little surprised when he crawled into bed with us this morning and we said Happy Birthday and he replied enthusiastically "Really? Today?" I guess for most of us the anticipation is a bigger deal than the actual event. James stayed home this morning and made apple pancakes for us and started putting together the Castle from Grandma and Grandpa Dougherty. He heard Seamus tell me that he didn't think I could put it together - that "Dad was the best at that". Sad but probably true.

So Seamus, Happy, Happy Birthday, Sweetheart. I have so many hopes for you this year and I'm looking forward to exploring the world through your eyes - I think this might be a year of fun firsts - I bet you'll try on ice skates for the first time this winter. I bet you'll be swimming on your own at the lake this summer. I bet Bob and Paula will take us over to the "bike riding" hill at St.Kate's. So much fun stuff - so many things we don't even know about yet.

While you were three, you went from simple sentences and some blurry words to complex thoughts and tons of interesting vocabulary. You finally have the words to communicate your wild imagination - which is always so much fun to hear about. You've discovered some new stories and right now you are in love with Harry Potter and his crew. We're half way through the second book and I'm still trying to figure out how we're going to take a break before starting the third. You aren't scared by the story and you seem to understand the nuances of the trouble Harry faces. I have to admit that I'm loving this time of story reading - I often feel a little thrilled when you want me to keep reading after we finish the chapter and more often than not we get to read a lot longer than I had intended.

You're back at preschool with Mary Jo and Nancy. You LOVE them and school - this morning you asked why we couldn't just go in the morning and not wait until after lunch. You're getting to bring treats for the first time today also (the beginning of the long school birthday tradition). We made some cookies to share and I know how excited you are about bringing them.

You planted a Sunflower garden this summer and you're already talking about your plans for next summer - makes me think garden is a gene we pass on (thanks, Dad). You brought flowers for Mary Jo from it on the first day of school and you were so proud. So was I.

What can I tell you about your-four-year-old-self? Well, you and Finn are best friends right now. Sometimes I don't know what to do when the two of you are running around like lunatics having fun but you're supposed to be getting ready for bed or school or something other than laughing and wrestling. I hate interrupting the fun you have because I know this time is so fleeting. And so far no one can make MJ laugh like you can - I hadn't ever seen an infant belly laugh - but somehow you can make her squeal with laughter. I'm going to try and get some video of it today.




By the time you're able to read these entries and understand them, the events of these early journals may not even be part of your memory. I hope that some if not most of it is, but only time with tell. We're doing this so you have a picture of your childhood and also so that you can see what is in our hearts as we're making this journey with you. I've come to realize something recently, I read a long time ago that you always have a different relationship with your oldest child, and I thought that was kind of silly. But now I see why that is true. You're "firsts" are also my "firsts". And so while you maybe got more attention than your siblings at first, you also have to muddle through my learning how to be a parent. And I hope as an adult you're gracious about my mistakes and know how much fun I had stumbling through this process with you. I often feel like we're in this together - helping each other be better people - you've taught me a lot about patience and consistency, about laughing and letting go.

The only way I can imagine that you'll ever know how much we love you, is when you hold your first child for the very first time. It is a feeling unlike anything else in the world and I can't believe it's already been four years for us.

We love you.